What gorgeous fall weather we are
having in South Georgia! Last night was a cool, breezy night of fun
playing in the backyard with the family. Throwing the football,
swinging, and eating chili on the deck made us not want to come
inside. Alas, the need for baths and an 8:30 bedtime came too
quickly.
With all the hustle and bustle of life,
there is nothing better than free-time outside with the ones you
love. Especially when the cool, crisp air makes you feel like you are
on vacation in the Smoky Mountains. Last night was pure contentment
for me. Our family likes to keep life as simple as possible, but
sometimes things run a little crazy. It’s evenings like this that
really remind me of what life is all about. It’s the simple
pleasures of being with the ones we love most and enjoying the
goodness of God.
I told Steve I wondered if God created
four seasons just so we wouldn’t get bored. It’s easier to
appreciate each one when they don’t last but 3 months! I’ve
learned to be thankful for the goodness each one brings. The cool,
crisp air and the beautiful colors of fall, the warmth of the
fireplace and snuggling up with a blanket and a cup of hot chocolate
in the winter, the beautiful flowers and chirping birds in the
spring, and hanging out at the pool and vacationing at the beach in
the summer. Of course, when shared with my family, it’s that much
sweeter.
The more life changes for us, the more
I am realizing that I need to relish in these simple
pleasures. With the kids growing up so fast, the death of Steve’s
dad, my dad being so sick and all the chaos around the world right
now, life is too short and changes too often not to enjoy the
blessings God has given me... and I am so blessed!
The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. Psalm 103:8.
I wish I would have been slow to anger this morning. Instead, I snapped at my son for stepping on my already injured toe. Of course it was an accident, but my knee-jerk reaction was a little harsh. My, how I need to practice this verse.
On a once in a blue moon occasion, I was shopping by myself two days ago. I had taken a much anticipated trip to Hobby Lobby, and one of their buggies took a mean gash out of my pinky toe. It looked to be healing fine, so I left it exposed after my shower. Not a good idea. Nathan was showing me some karate moves this morning when he rammed his tennis shoe right into my poor pinky toe, opening the wound all over again. I yelled, "OUCH, Nathan watch what you're doing!!!" Then a smidgen calmer, "I know it was an accident but you don't have to be acting crazy all the time." I finished brushing his hair while I composed myself, and told him to finish what he was trying to tell me. As he started, he began to cry. I pulled him close and hugged him reassuring him that I knew it was an accident and I didn't mean to react that way. I know he felt really bad for hurting me, especially after he saw my toe bleeding again. But my initial reaction made him feel worse.
How I wish I could control those initial reactions better. I never knowingly want to hurt my children's feelings. As I looked at my toe this morning, I saw how much farther I have to go. Then I heard Matt Redman on the radio discussing his story behind the song, "10,000 Reasons." (one of my favorite songs). He explained Psalm 103 had been the key verse behind the song because the Psalmist can't seem to stop talking about all the many reasons he has to praise God. Before I even got home from taking the kids to school, there were tears streaming down my face. Perhaps, if I were more thankful for all the blessings in my life, my knee-jerk reactions who be a little different. I opened my Bible and read Psalm 103. There is no telling how many times I have read this chapter, but oh how beautiful it was this morning. Thank God that he knows I am formed of dust and has compassion on me.(vs.14) Perhaps it would benefit my children more, if I did the same for them.
I am humbled this morning because of a crazy incident concerning a hurt toe and the beautiful words of Psalm 103, given to me at just the right time. It's good to be "taken down a notch" once in a while, and no-one can do that better than God.
Listen to "10,000 Reasons" and count your many blessings. Even in the midst of trials or just the everyday mundane, there's something we can thank God for. After all, the sun came up this morning.
Kids can be brutally honest, especially
boys. At least at our house. When we’re young, we don’t always
have the good judgment to think before we speak. Actually many
adults don’t either, but that’s a different story for a different
day.
One busy Sunday morning a couple of
years ago, I was frustrated trying to get everyone ready and out the
door for church. Steve had already left to drive the church bus
before Sunday school, and I was running behind. I remember standing
in the kitchen wiping the milk from Nathan’s face, and I was quite
grumpy. He sighed a heavy sigh and asked, “Why do you always have
to be mad?” Ouch!
Now I wasn’t necessarily mad. I was
irritated by the string of little things that had built up my
frustration level that morning. But to a 6 year old, it all seems
the same. My heart sank. I didn’t want that to be the way Nathan
saw me. It was another eye-opening comment from one of my children.
Sometimes, the pattern of becoming
easily irritated simply becomes a habit, a bad habit. It’s a
pattern that needs to be broken. 1 Corinthians 13: 5 (NLT) says,
“Love is not rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not
irritable…” It isn’t my “right” just because things
are not going my way to get irritated with those around me.
That isn’t showing love.
I don’t want my kids to roll their
eyes, sigh and think, “That’s just the way mom is.” That is
not what love is, so that is not who I want to be. And it isn’t
who I have to be. I can wait quietly before the Lord, for my victory
comes from Him. Psalm 62:1. Through the help of the Holy Spirit and
time spent with Jesus in prayer and in God’s word, we can overcome
any struggle with sin. We can have the victory. “Overwhelming
victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.” Romans 8:37
Nathan irritated with me for taking a pic of his bed head!
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but
a broken spirit saps a person’s strength.
Proverbs 17:22
Our pastor sent us this adorable
picture of Sophie that he took during VBS stating that “nothing is
cuter than little girls when their giggle boxes get tipped over.”
He’s right. I love to hear Sophie laugh. It’s infectious. And
there is something about a group of little girls who have the giggles
that is just contagious.
Oh how I wish I could laugh like that
more often. I love getting together with friends and laughing. It
just makes everything seem better, lighter. My thought about this
picture was that I wish I could laugh like Sophie does. Sometimes I
let stress and circumstances get the best of me. Sometimes I just
need to take a break and share in my children’s laughter or take
some time to be with friends who make me laugh and feel good. Notice
I said, “take the time”. So often our busy schedules put those
times on the back burner. But the busyness and stress of life is why
we need to make time to be with friends and family. Sophie
wasn’t laughing alone. I’m sure she had some little buddies
laughing right along with her.
I know life has many difficulties, but
that is why it is so important to find a way to be cheerful and laugh
some during the day. Just thinking about the sad, bad and stressful
stuff saps our strength. The Good News Translation puts the second
half of Proverbs 17:22 this way. “It is a slow death to be gloomy
all the time.” Hmm…a slow death. That’s what it can feel like
when you are sad or perplexed all the time, right? So, take a break
and share a laugh with someone. It’s like medicine without the icky
taste.
I dedicate this article to my father-in-law, Bob. I wrote this last week not knowing that we would have to say goodbye to him today. He was a man who loved to laugh, and he was a natural at making others laugh. He loved to have fun, but he was also caring and encouraging. It was hard to feel bad when he was around. I only knew him for 11 years. I wish it could have been longer. We will surely miss him.
For God has not given us a spirit of
fear, but of power, love and a sound mind.
2 Timothy 1:7.
When Nathan was younger he loved to
sing in front of the church with his Cherub Choir. He always had to
be square in front of the microphone, and if he wasn’t, he’d inch
his way over so that he could be. Nathan was never a shy baby or
toddler. He loved the spotlight. As he has gotten older, he has
become very nervous about being in front of people. Not only that,
but the little boy who never met a stranger has become too nervous to
introduce himself to kids he doesn’t know. I never saw that
coming.
Sophie was an extremely shy baby but
grew out of that into a socially happy child who loves to meet new
friends. She also loves to sing with her choir and recently did a
terrific job with her first solo part. However, when she discovered
that she had actually done a solo (she thought that since the other
kids were standing with her, it wasn’t a solo) she said she was too
nervous to do it again.
I know the agony of letting fear rule
my heart through nervousness. Unlike Nathan and Sophie who are
nervous because people are watching, my fear was what people would
think or that I would mess up. It happened a lot in school and kept
me from doing things I would have enjoyed, like chorus or trying out
for sports. I didn’t want anyone to see me mess up.
I don’t want that for my children. My
heart breaks to think that they hold back from doing things they are
really good at and enjoy because they are too nervous. However, when
I try to encourage them, I hear a little voice saying that I should
be listening to my own words. I have come a long way, but I still
have a ways to go. I play the comparison game and am afraid others
will do the same. When I recently sang my first solo part in front
of our church during our Easter musical, I dreaded it for weeks. I
was so afraid of what people would think. What if I messed up? What
if I sounded awful? One day when I was thinking those things, I felt Jesus whisper to me, "If you really believe the words, then sing it tome and don't worry about everyone else." That brought me peace. It didn't take away the nervousness completely, but I knew he was with me.
Our motto last week in VBS is “Facing
Fear, Trusting God.” I pray that this was ingrained in my children to help them overcome their fears of being in front of
people. I know God has gifted them with talents, and I don’t want
them to be too afraid to use them. I also know that I need to be a
good example to my children and face my own fears, trusting God to
see me through. I don’t want Nathan and Sophie to be prideful, but
I want them to trust God and not let fear paralyze them and hold them
back. That’s not God’s desire for them. According to 2 Timothy
1:7, fear and timidity doesn’t come from him, but power, love and
sound judgment does. God is helping me to overcome my fears. He is
giving me confidence. Not in my own abilities but in what he is
doing in me and wants to do through me. I pray that he does the same
for Nathan and Sophie, only much, much earlier.
I had a really tough day today. My
baby graduated Kindergarten. Wasn’t it just last week that I wrote
about her first day?! This crept up on me yesterday, and I didn’t
even realize why I felt emotional until I started ironing her
graduation gown last night. I caught a glimpse of ironing her high school graduation gown. To make it worse I looked back through
her preschool keepsake books that her wonderful teachers made. Then the tears began to fall.
As a mom, I sometimes get tired of
being needed all the time. Come on, I am sure if you are a mom,
you’ve felt that way too. Having your name called 1000 times a day,
answering the 100th question of the day or looking for
that lost _____ (you fill in the blank). Sometimes it all seems a
little exhausting. However, it makes me sad to think that the older
my children get, the less they will need me. I’ll admit it; my
whole life has revolved around my children. But the older they get,
the more they need to take responsibility in order to learn how to
manage life. The more they need to do things for themselves and work
problems out on their own. It makes me very nervous to think about
having to let my kids start making some decisions on their own. But
if we don’t, they will always expect mom and dad to “fix”
everything. They can’t go through life like that and turn out to be
responsible, well adjusted teens and adults.
Of course I know that as parents, our
job is to guide their decision making process so that they learn to
make right choices on their own. Right now, we still have the means
and the responsibility to make the right decisions for them if they
can’t or won’t. I pray that Steve and I are instilling in them
the wisdom they need to one day make those important and even
everyday decisions on their own (with God’s help). We will always
be here for them, but the day is coming when we will not be able to
be by their sides telling them what they need to do in every
situation. Oh, I dread that day!
I realize that they may not always need
me holding their hand to get them through everything, but they will
always need my prayers, love and support…and they will always have
it.
I recently uploaded my pictures from
Christmas. Yes, it takes me a while. I found a picture I had
forgotten about. It was a darling picture of Sophie and my nieces.
As I looked at this picture, I saw such sweet innocence. Their
cheerful smiles and bright eyes made me wish the younger four could
stay this way forever. Too soon they will grow into preteens,
teenagers and young women. Gabrielle, the oldest, has grown into a
beautiful, bright young woman who loves the Lord.
When Sophie was four years old, I
painted on her wall, in big, bold letters Psalm 139:14 “I will
praise you because I am remarkably and wonderfully made; your works
are wonderful, and I know this very well.” We recited it every
night before bed. Since we have moved, she has asked me to paint it
in her new room. I want her to know right from the start that God
made her wonderful and beautiful, just the way she is.
I can't just talk about it though; I need to be a good example
for her. I’m learning it takes an effort to live that out
in front of her. I have to be careful not to let her see me fret
about my weight or hair or skin. I want to teach her that taking care of
herself is important because we are God’s temple and we are to
honor him with our bodies. (1 Corinthians 6:19,20) We try to eat
healthy, get exercise and dress appropriately as Christians. No, I don't believe we have to be covered from head to toe, but we are to dress modestly. (1
Timothy 2:9) I want her to have enough respect for herself and feel good enough about herself that when she is older, she doesn't feel the need to dress in a way that would draw negative attention and take focus off of who she really is on the inside. We like cute clothes and painting our toenails, but we
don’t over-emphasize our outer beauty because God looks on the
heart. (1 Samuel 16:7) 1 Peter 3: 3-4 says “Don’t be concerned
about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry or
beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the
beauty that comes from within...” I want our girls to know that
they are beautiful because God loves them and made them special.
They don’t have to look like anyone else but who they are.
Just like moms, dads play such an
important role in their daughters’ lives. If a Daddy loves his
little girl and is affectionate toward her and actively protects and
cares for her, his daughter will feel like she is worth being treated
with love and respect. Not only that, but if our daughters see Dad
treat Mom in a loving and respectful way, she will know how her
potential suitors should treat her. Daddies should be careful not
to demean women or make crude comments about women. Our daughters
are watching and listening.
Sophie has such a sweet nature and a
compassionate heart. Our prayer is that she would be sheltered by
our love and more importantly by God’s love so that the world
around her doesn’t steel that from her. So that she knows she has
a place where she is accepted and loved no matter what. A place where
she can bare her soul and not be condemned. A place where she can
make mistakes and be forgiven. A place where she can grow and learn
with all the support we can give her. A place where she is free to
sing and dance like no one is watching, even when we are.
Sophie and all of my nieces are unique
and wonderful, just the way God made them. My prayer is that they are
growing up with confidence in who God made them to be. As we
encourage our daughters’ strengths, assist them through their
weaknesses (without criticizing) and teach them about God’s love
for them, they will know who they are. They are not just our
princesses; they are princesses of the Most High King.
In the past two months we have
celebrated birthdays for both of our children. I cannot believe that
my baby is 6 and my first born is 8. Sometimes it seems like they
have always been with us. Other times it seems like just yesterday
they were babies. They should still be about 3 and 5. Where did
the time go?!
So much has changed in the eight years
since I became a mom. My whole world turned upside down and inside
out the day Nathan was born. I look back now at how exhausting and
challenging those early days were with two little ones only 22 months
apart, and I wish I could have them back. Isn’t that funny? I
miss watching Baby Einstein and Little Einsteins with them.
I miss holding them in my arms (without hurting my back) and having them toddling around my feet.
So, on Nathan’s birthday, April 1st,
I was reminded of a recent devotion from our student minister during a
family night at church. He encouraged us not to dwell on the past
but to embrace the present. This really helped me to put my thoughts
into perspective. I can dwell on the desire to have my children be
babies and toddlers again (and be sad) or I can celebrate the ages
they are right now. Wishing they were babies again is futile. It
accomplishes nothing. Enjoying them at 6 and 8 accomplishes much.
Yes, it’s perfectly okay to reminisce
over sweet memories, but they shouldn’t make us sad and long for
the past. They should make us eager to make every moment count.
Knowing that the days go by so fast should be reason enough for us to
embrace every moment. Ephesians 5:15-16 says “Be very careful
then, how you live-not as unwise but as wise, making the most of
every opportunity…” So I pray that God will help me to make the
most of the opportunities that I have with my children now…for
tomorrow, they will be grown.
Field trips. Got to love em. Well at
least the kids do. After a very crazy day of chaperoning a recent
field trip with my children and half of their school, we all three
crashed on the couch exhausted. As Sophie worked with the remote to
find a show to watch, she had to give it to me to get it where it
needed to be. It’s one of those universal remotes that even I
can’t figure out sometimes. As she lay down beside me, she asked,
“Why can’t I do things right?” Thinking she was frustrated with
the remote, I asked her what she meant. “Why can’t I listen?”
she asked.
Okay, now let me back up. On the way
back to the school from the field trip, we were talking about what we
had to do after school. She was fussing and complaining because she
couldn’t do certain things she wanted to do. Even after I explained
to her why she couldn’t, she kept on. Now I knew she was tired so
I was patient with her. Finally after I had heard enough, I told her
she was being ungrateful. I had just spent the whole day with her on
her field trip, and it was all about her having fun. After thinking
for a while, she told me she was sorry for acting that way.
Then at a store, she whined and
complained again because she couldn’t get a game she wanted. Even
after I explained why, she kept on. Don’t you love that? Me
neither.
When we got in the car, she began to
cry and said she was sorry. So when she asked me at home why she
wasn’t able to listen, I knew she had really been thinking about
it. I knew she didn’t need a lecture. What she needed was the
truth spoken in love, and she needed grace.
I couldn’t help but sympathize with
her. I too wonder and ask God sometimes, “Why can’t I get it
right?” After trying and trying to improve on things and going
round and round in circles, I feel defeated too. Do you know what my
Father gives me? Truth and grace. God knows my heart. I may not
always get everything right, but He still loves me anyway. I felt
like that is what Sophie needed to know. That I love her even when
she messes up… over and over again. The fact that she is trying and
wants to change makes me more willing to show her mercy. God also
knows when we really desire to obey Him and live according to His
word. Thankfully, He shows mercy upon mercy to me too.
“The Lord
God has told us what is right and what He demands: “See that
justice is done, let mercy be your first concern, and humbly obey
your God.” Micah 6: 8
“The
faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease. Great
is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.”
Lamentations 22,23
Most of us think our children are
innocent. Don’t we? Of course we do, because they are! When they are young, they see things through
innocent eyes and pure hearts. While at our family gathering at my
mom and dad’s house on Christmas, Sophie was playing with her new
Princess Ariel and Prince Erik Barbie dolls. She had them close
together as if they were hugging or dancing. She has seen this on
princess movies like Cinderella where Cinderella and her prince dance
at the ball. She also sees her Dad and me hug a lot.
Our entire family of about 25 was
sitting around my parents’ den talking and checking out each
other’s Christmas gifts. I watched Sophie as she played. After
she laid the dolls down, I asked her if they were dancing? Nathan
heard me and said very loudly, “It looks like they are dancing
lying down!” All of the adults burst into laughter including
myself. The innocence of his comment was what made it so funny. He
had no idea why we were laughing.
I love that about my children. They
are still so innocent. That hasn’t happened by chance though.
There is enough out there in this world to steal their innocence even
at their young ages. Steve and I purposely work to keep that from
happening. We monitor what they see on television, they only play educational and age appropriate video games and we only listen to
Christian radio. They never watch movies with anything above a PG
rating. Even then, we pay close attention to the contents to make
sure it is OK. Those magazines at the check-out lines with headlines that make even me blush get turned around quickly
to shield Nathan and Sophie from reading the vulgar content on
them.
I’m not bragging by any means. I’m
just learning more and more that it takes a concerted effort on a
parent’s part to protect their children from indecency or things
that are too mature for little minds and hearts to understand. I
love a quote from Corrie Ten Boom’s book, The Hiding Place. When she was still quite young, Corrie asked her father about
something he didn’t think she was ready to know. This was his wise response:
“It would be a pretty poor father
who would ask his little girl to carry such a heavy load. [speaking
of his tool case] It’s the same way, Corrie, with knowledge. Some
knowledge is too heavy for children. When you are older and stronger
you can bear it. For now you must trust me to carry it for you.”
Oh, how much wisdom did this man have!
We need to preserve our children’s innocence as long as we can.
They should be able to just enjoy the innocence of childhood. They
will learn the troubles of adulthood and the perverseness and violence of the world soon enough.
More often than not, I have mommy
guilt. Guilt when I make one of my children cry even though they
deserved the correction. Guilt when I raise my voice. Guilt because
I forgot to send lunch money or that we haven’t worked on scripture
memorization in weeks. Guilt, guilt, guilt. And of course, there is
the concern that none of the things I am teaching them is actually
doing any good.
Then those sacred moments happen that
let me know Steve and I must be doing something right. That all
those lessons and talks have actually touched their hearts and deep
down are actually taking root. Moments that remind us that we really
do have great kids.
This Christmas had been quite an
unusual Christmas. My sweet aunt Bertha that I wrote about in “I
want to Leave a Legacy” went home to be with the Lord Dec. 22. I
left the kids to be at the hospital several times during the week
prior to her death. On the same day, my brother-in-law’s dad also
went home to be with the Lord. We attended both funerals on
Christmas Eve. Not exactly the joyous Christmas any of us would have
chosen.
Even in the midst of the sadness,
Christmas morning rolled around with the usual excitement and joy.
It was the day Sophie and Nathan had been counting down to. I could
hear their anxious laughter through Nathan’s bedroom door as I made
them wait until all the Christmas lights were on and their Dad
finally made it into the family room. (They were up at 6:30) After
they had each opened their three presents from Santa, they did
not even ask to open their other presents that were under the tree. They excitedly
ran and grabbed Steve’s present and mine and insisted we open our
presents first.
Wow, what five and seven year old does
that? I was so proud of them that they cared more about our
happiness than their own. They wanted us to see what we got for
Christmas before they did. They were so sweet. I have to say, I was
amazed. Perhaps all the talks of “giving is better than
receiving,” and “think of others first” have actually had an
impact. They truly practiced these Biblical principles that morning.
So, instead of feeling guilty all the
time about something that we have done wrong with our children, it is really okay to look at the things we do right. We can breathe a
sigh of relief (at least for the moment) that God is using us to
positively impact our precious children.
This morning was a tough morning. I
lost it with my precious daughter. I got angry because she had lost
something…again. We were already pushed for time for school and we
couldn’t find her watch. Today was Neon Day at school and her
bright pink watch would have been a perfect accessory (and of course
I had this idea at the last minute). It was nowhere to be found.
Sophie is a free spirit and often
misplaces her things. She will put them in purses, backpacks, under
a pillow or her bed, any place except for where they are supposed to
go. I lost it. I fussed at her about a silly little watch. It
wasn’t so much the watch as the fact that we are constantly looking
for something she has lost.
However this was no excuse for losing
it with her and making her feel 2 inches tall. I hated myself this
morning. As I walked into the bathroom and saw her crying but at the
same time trying to hold it back, my heart sank. Why did I do that?
Why did I go off on her like that? I held her while she sobbed and
told her I was sorry. My ranting had hurt her deeply. I asked her
to forgive me and she kissed me on the cheek. She showed me more
grace than I had shown her.
She is such a sweetheart that when I
bought that half-priced pink watch, she gave her green one to a boy
at school that wanted one. She is so thoughtful. She is always thinking of me. Everyday
she brings me something from school that she has made for me. At
church, everything she colors or makes is for me. If she makes
something for her daddy, it’s for Daddy…and Mommy. She loves me
so much. Why had I broken her heart over a $5.00 watch?
You can imagine that on the way to
work, I beat myself up mercilessly. “I’m a terrible mom.” I
kept saying to myself. Then when I got to work, the email devotion I
received this morning from “Girlfriends in God” was about this
very same thing. In fact, the first line from the author read, “I’m a terrible
mom!” Tears streamed down my face. This woman that God uses to touch the lives of thousands of women was telling about her "crazy person" moment when she too had lost her cool with her child. Once again, God was gracious
to me. He gave me the exact encouragement I needed exactly when I
needed it. He was not the one condemning me. He wanted to help me.
I don’t have to believe the lies of
Satan. I really messed up this morning. I sinned against my baby
girl with uncontrolled anger. But that doesn’t mean I am a
terrible mom and that I will always do stuff like this. God is
changing me from glory to glory.(2 Corinthians 3:18)
My meditation
verse for now is Psalm 19:14, “May the words of my mouth and the
meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and
my Redeemer.” Obviously, I’m not there yet. I’m learning it’s
a process, and I know that I can’t do it without the help of the
Holy Spirit.
So fill me Holy Spirit and help me
to keep my mouth shut until my emotions are calm and controlled.
Amen
Sophie and I at the Cabbage Patch Hospital in Cleveland, GA
(Actual event occurred Friday, October
26th, and by the way, I found the watch while cleaning out
the van a week later. It was under her seat.)
“Don’t look at me like that when I
tell you to do something.” Lately, every time I tell Nathan to do
something that he doesn’t want to do, he gives me a look. If you
are a parent, you probably know what I am talking about, that
combined look of disappointment, frustration and a touch of anger.
He also gives the same look when I correct him about something.
Usually, it concerns him being nice to Sophie.
I allowed the look for a little while.
I don’t want my children to think that I want to completely control
their lives. I also don’t want them to stuff or bury emotions or
tell them how they should feel. However, I do want to train
them to live by the Word of God, which says we should do everything
without complaining or arguing (Philippians 2:14). Apparently,
Nathan has learned not to do either of those verbally, so he gives me
“the look”.
I do insist on Nathan and Sophie being
respectful, and this look was beginning to become disrespectful. Most
of the time, it comes when he forgets (or gets side-tracked) and
doesn’t do something I have already told him to do. He doesn’t
like having to stop what he wants to do and do what I have
told him to do. So I had a talk with Nathan about his new facial
expressions. I told him that I never ask too much of him or tell him
to do something that he is not able to do. I felt like the look he
was giving me showed disrespect, and I wanted him to stop. He
straightened out his face, and sighed, “Okay”.
It got me thinking. I wonder if God
feels disrespected and dishonored when I get side-tracked instead of
obeying him immediately. Does he feel disrespected when I obey but
do it with far less than a happy heart? Through Nathan (and one of
our recent Sunday school lessons), I am beginning to see this as a
possible lack of respect for authority and/or perhaps a lack of
trust. Nathan needs to show more respect for my authority as his
parent by trusting that I know more than he does and am giving him
instruction because he needs it. Am I showing a lack of respect for
God’s authority as my Heavenly Father, God of gods and Lord of
lords when I don’t obey him immediately with the right attitude?
Do I trust that He has my best interest at heart? If I know His
word, His character and His heart, I won’t have a difficult time
trusting him or giving him the utmost respect He deserves. "Trust and obey, for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus but to trust and obey."
This was written about 3 months ago.
I’m happy to report that I have not received any dirty looks since
then (at least not to my face).
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