Put the Guilt on Pause

Christmas Morning Fun!!!

More often than not, I have mommy guilt. Guilt when I make one of my children cry even though they deserved the correction. Guilt when I raise my voice. Guilt because I forgot to send lunch money or that we haven’t worked on scripture memorization in weeks. Guilt, guilt, guilt. And of course, there is the concern that none of the things I am teaching them is actually doing any good.

Then those sacred moments happen that let me know Steve and I must be doing something right. That all those lessons and talks have actually touched their hearts and deep down are actually taking root. Moments that remind us that we really do have great kids.

This Christmas had been quite an unusual Christmas. My sweet aunt Bertha that I wrote about in “I want to Leave a Legacy” went home to be with the Lord Dec. 22. I left the kids to be at the hospital several times during the week prior to her death. On the same day, my brother-in-law’s dad also went home to be with the Lord. We attended both funerals on Christmas Eve. Not exactly the joyous Christmas any of us would have chosen.

Even in the midst of the sadness, Christmas morning rolled around with the usual excitement and joy. It was the day Sophie and Nathan had been counting down to. I could hear their anxious laughter through Nathan’s bedroom door as I made them wait until all the Christmas lights were on and their Dad finally made it into the family room. (They were up at 6:30) After they had each opened their three presents from Santa, they did not even ask to open their other presents that were under the tree. They excitedly ran and grabbed Steve’s present and mine and insisted we open our presents first.

Wow, what five and seven year old does that? I was so proud of them that they cared more about our happiness than their own. They wanted us to see what we got for Christmas before they did. They were so sweet. I have to say, I was amazed. Perhaps all the talks of “giving is better than receiving,” and “think of others first” have actually had an impact. They truly practiced these Biblical principles that morning.

So, instead of feeling guilty all the time about something that we have done wrong with our children, it is really okay to look at the things we do right. We can breathe a sigh of relief (at least for the moment) that God is using us to positively impact our precious children.