My Girl

Just when I think I am getting the hang of this parenting thing, I’m thrown for a loop. It has always seemed that way. When I get used to my children doing one thing or being one way, they throw me a curveball. The end (or beginning) of a phase, stage or whatever you want to call it catches me off guard. I should be used to it by now, but I’m not.

Six months ago (to the day) when my daughter Sophie turned 8, she began showing her individualism and need for independence. She no longer wanted to wear the cute clothes from Matilda Jane and Jelly the Pug. The ruffly pant sets from Zulily are no more. “They look like they’re for babies.” Sigh… Every Sunday now when I pick out her clothes, she would rather wear something different. Not too long ago, she loved everything I bought for her. Not anymore.

It made me sad when she reluctantly told me she wasn’t crazy about “My Little Pony” anymore. I say “reluctantly” because she knew how I would feel. She and I used to love watching it together. I knew all those cute little ponies by name! She no longer plays with dolls except her “American Girl” dolls. No Barbies or princesses either. In fact, when cleaning out her toys, she decided to give most of them away.

I guess I thought we would go on enjoying these things together for years to come, but she has her own set of likes and dislikes, and I am learning that I cannot force her to stay little forever. I am realizing that she is developing into her own “person” and she no longer agrees with all my opinions. She has always been my little side-kick, so it’s tough to watch her separating herself from me. In my mind, I know it is a good thing. She is learning to be confident in her own thoughts and decisions. I know it’s not healthy to force my own personal tastes on her. She needs to be able to stretch her wings and not rely on me to make every decision for her. However, my heart hasn’t quite caught up yet.

She still shows that she needs me, though and wants to cuddle every night. So I am heeding the words of so many moms before me, I am making the most of these opportunities. She had a headache last night so I lay in bed with her and held her until she fell asleep. No matter how big or independent she gets, she will always be my baby. I’ll admit that the future of navigating through tween and teen years with my girl somewhat intimidates me. I want to hold on tight. God grant me the wisdom to know when to hold on and when to relinquish the reigns (and the ability to do so).